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Beating a dead choir

I make a hell of a breakfast burrito. I just find whatever is left over in the fridge—mushrooms, asparagus, sliced rib-eye, maybe even a Kraft single or two—and mash it all up with scrambled eggs, and stuff it inside a couple of those fresh tortillas I blogged about a few years ago. The key is spooning in lots of red chile.

Oh…I’m sorry. I must be on the wrong page. Somehow I ended up on some putz’s lame breakfast blog, when what I was looking for was the pre-eminent bastion of lunch thought-leadership on the information super highway. My bad.

What’s wrong with you? Every time? You have to do this every time? I don’t mean to be preaching to a dead horse, but I won’t ask you again…

Anyway, on golf days like yesterday, I’ve gotten in the habit of making a few extra burritos in the morning to take out on the course with me so I don’t have to struggle and fuss with sloppy distracting lunch food. I ended up eating 5 or 6 eggs yesterday all tolled as a result, but I don’t care. I take those pills that the bald guys on TV talk about. Not the ones that help with the boners—the other ones that help with the cholesterol. Yeah, those. I like those.


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skeeter on :

I've been a loyal reader of RLB since the beginning, and I'd have to say, this entry is the bee's meow.

F Banger on :

Skeeter, I'm glad you didn't say bee's knees because this blog blows. You would think a self proclaimed lunch pioneer would know how to dress a hot dog without dripping condiments all over. And then go on and blaim his golf game on excess mustard on his glove.

Ricky on :

I think "blows" is a little harsh, F. Banger. I'd have gone with "substandard."

F Banger on :

No one tells F Banger how to comment. Besides, when one writes about boner pills, "blows" is appropriate.

Ricky on :

You've been rather surly lately, F. Banger. Is everything ok?

F Banger on :

Irregularity. But don't judge me.

Bruce from LI on :

Is it the struggle and fuss you want to avoid or are you just cheap and don't want to dole out $2.00 for a hot dog?

Stuart on :

It's clear that this entire entry was simply a vehicle for using the word "boners". On the one hand, I didn't care for the way that "boners" stole the spotlight from lunch. On the other hand, the entry was so masterful in its unveiling of "boners" I almost didn't care.

So I say this post is significantly better than substandard. It's standard or maybe even superstandard. Nice work, O Leader.

Ricky on :

Wow, Stuart. You are totally in my head right now. Actually, the whole purpose was to drop the "preaching to a dead horse" line---Skeeter will back me up on this. The boners bit was spontaneous opportunism; it's what thought-leadership is made of.

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