Book me on the next flight ...

Ever since I went to the food court at the mall a few weeks ago to work on that stupid summary of my stupid novel for that pompous, arrogant, no-taste New York literary agent, I’ve been returning weekly just for the Mediterranean food. I’ve never been to Mediterranean, but if this food is any indication, I bet it’S a wicked-awesome country to live in.

One of their traditional dishes is called sampler, which I thought was a fish of some kind, like a snapper, but I was wrong. Sampler is a totally unique dish that bares no resemblance to any lunch food this thought leader has ever analyzed. There’s something that looks like meat that comes off of a big meat cone. Then there’s these crusty balls, which I believe are carefully removed from some exotic animal that feeds only on saw dust. Then there’s these stubby little leafy cigars soaked in olive oil. Oh yeah---there’s also 3 different sauces that all look alike but taste different, one of which—I’m quite certain—is also secreted from the sawdust-eating beast. Figure 1, below, is my attempt to come to terms with all this.


Figure 1. Sampler is Ricky'S new favorite lunch food.